Why Drug Testing Employees for Cannabis is Ineffective

By Emmett H.W. Nelson | May 15, 2017

Acting immaturely and getting let go from a job are a rite of passage for most American taxpayers. Infractions like stealing hours, napping at work and calling off the morning after a night of drinking often times catch the ire of management types looking to increase productivity, efficiency and the bottom line. It’s not just minimum wage workers in menial and monotonous roles that slack off; professionals from all walks of life commit youthful transgressions regularly to the dismay of employers.

Corporate America and the military industrial complex intend to prevent these atrocities and bend citizens to their will through screening potential and current employees for hazardous drug use. As a product of Vietnam War era policy and a relic of Reaganomics this method has been kept intact by our governmental leadership and adopted by nearly the every Fortune 1000 company but proven to be an ineffective and cost prohibitive technique for predicting performance.

Drug tests are inherently flawed. They can only test for drug metabolites that are currently in the subject’s system and don’t take into account preventative measures undertaken by a prospective employee. A habitual cocaine or smack user who knows a that failed test will result in disqualification from consideration for a position is able to hold off from tooting or shooting for 3-4 days in order for their blood and urine to be clean upon examination. Conversely cannabis can stay in a users pee for up to a month after only a single toke.

Not even the Russian hacking scandal and this whole mess we’re in with Donald Trump in office and James Comey’s recent dismissal can avoid being directly tied to drug screening in the work place. Back in 2014 Comey expressed frustration with the FBI’s ability to attract top talent to go after cyber attacks because those with the requisite skills to do so also like to get high. The FBI doesn’t have the capacity to hire the best minds to safeguard our national security so we were left with third stringers defending the Democracy against the exact thing that got The Donald elected and Comey was investigating when he got canned.

Let’s test some drugs

It is poor form to assume that all drug users are reckless, harmful or otherwise unable to perform essential duties of the jobs they are being screened for. Corporate behemoths, niche firms and everything in between are forging ahead free from limitations and control that drug screening places on individuals. Modernization and originality have long histories with handshake drugs. Francis Crick discovered the Double helix whilst tripping balls and Steve Jobs regarded his LSD use as a profound experience and important to his life. Silicon Valley unofficially endorses a more casual approach drug policy so you’ll be hard pressed to find the likes of Apple, Facebook, Google and Twitter stifling innovation and creativity by asking prospects to whiz in a cup.

Businesses in the cannabis industry wouldn’t be able be able to operate if they tested employees for drugs either. O.pen Vape tried that a while ago and they got trolled into submission, which prompted them to update their guidelines. The tendency to indulge in abundant cannabis use throughout the day may strike most nine to fivers as an impossible way to conduct business. Cannabis serves a similar function to that of caffeine in coffee for many by offering an awakening, refreshing and invigorating rush to start the day or keep the momentum going throughout business hours.

It’s too bad don’t talk to me until I have my morning blunt isn’t an acceptable retort to early risers cheerful inquiries.

Emmett H.W. Nelson

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