Churchgoers in Ellettsville, Indiana might have thought they saw God in the spring of 2016, but that’s likely due to the effects of the cannabis-infused cookies they unknowingly ingested. Now, a 74-year-old man named Brian N. Jones is facing charges for allegedly giving the cookies to people at his church.
Police began their highly important investigation into the dastardly deeds of the elderly cookie criminal way back in May of 2016. The investigation got under way after six people at St. John the Apostle Church were hospitalized after eating cookies that reportedly came from Jones. Their hospitalization, as is the case with the majority of stories like this, was likely unnecessary and based almost entirely on the fact that they didn’t know what they were experiencing and felt dizzy, anxious or paranoid.
The people who ingested the cookies ranged from 12-70 years old. Of course, the slant the mainstream news outlets took was that this was a serious issue and that the people who ingested the cookies could be in danger.
“We are praying for everyone involved. We are praying for Mr. Jones. We are keeping in prayer those who took ill that Sunday and we are praying for justice with mercy,”
said Father Daniel Mahan of St. John’s Church.
In all likelihood, a good meal and good night’s sleep would have been all they needed to let the THC run its course, causing them to wake up and feel fine. Instead, this is yet another case where hysteria set in and taxpayer money was used unnecessarily on police resources. We saw similar outrage occur when an Ohio mom claimed to find weed in her daughter’s fries from Wendy’s. As we said then, her daughter was probably more at risk of health problems from the sodium and fat content in the fries than the cannabis itself. Similarly in this case, the cannabis cookie eaters were likely in more danger from the sugar content in the cookies.
Police took one of Jones’ cookies and sent it in for analysis, and it tested positive for THC. They could have saved that time and money and used in on solving real crimes. Jones faces two charges, including criminal recklessness and possession of hash oil.
If the man had spiked the punch bowl with vodka instead, would he be facing criminal charges? You decide. In all seriousness, neither spiking someone’s drink nor giving them edibles unbeknownst to them are acceptable actions, especially when children are involved. Keep your goodies to yourself and don’t force them on anyone that otherwise would refuse them. It’s stories like these and irresponsible people like Jones that can give responsible adult cannabis users a bad name.
Originally published: The Marijuana Times
This post was originally published on March 12, 2017, it was updated on March 16, 2017.